6 Tips for Overcoming Mom Burnout

Thursday, February 7, 2019

Motherhood is one of the most difficult jobs in the world. Being a mom is hard, harder than I thought. When a women becomes a mother, everything changes. You're priority is no longer yourself, now your priorities are your children, and also the millions of daily tasks that you have to complete. As a mother we probably don't ask for much, or we don't ask at all because It will makes us look as an incompetent or selfish mother.

MOM BURNOUT DEFINITION: The mother of children who is dead tired, worn out, overwhelmed and has no time for herself. She sleeps with one ear on listening for awake children; wears comfy clothes; eats standing up; cleans, pick-ups, entertains, plays, comforts, cuddles, nurses, fold, washes, rocks a child to sleep, is sleep deprived.She's wonder woman, but she's dead tired walking zombie. Selfishly takes care of everyone around her, but herself. 

Whether you're a stay at home mom, or a working mom the feeling of being burnt out, chronically exhausted and overwhelmed on a daily basis is real. First and foremost, if you are feeling this way, I'm here to tell you that you're not alone. Almost every mom experiences some sort of mom burnout.

I'm a mother of two beautiful girls, ages 11 and a 8 month old baby. My girls are my WORLD....  I live for my girls, their happiness and well being are the most important things for me. However, having a pre-teen and a baby is exhausting. When I was pregnant with my youngest I thought,"Oh this is going to be easy, the oldest will help me and everything is going to be fine." I quickly began to realize after having Lily how different every child is.I also began to noticed how everything revolved around the baby. I was so exhausted (I still am),I hardly had time for anything but Lily. I was neglecting myself, taking care of myself was out of this equation; constantly being upset and just overall miserable. Somehow I was loosing myself in a mom fog. I wasn't the best mom, daughter, sister or girlfriend to my family. 

Here's what Burnout feels like: 

  • You feel “trapped”
  • You may feel you “lost yourself to motherhood”
  • You can easily get stir crazy being at home for long periods of time
  • You can be easily irritated and lose your patience
  • You don’t do your beauty or health routines that you did before you were a mom
  • You feel you need “space”
  • You feel you never have time alone
  • You feel your whole day revolves around your children’s schedule
  • You rarely buy anything for yourself or focus on things you like to do
If you're still reading this, I'm pretty sure you feel the same way I did or still do at times. Here are my suggestion on overcoming mom burnout, and having a self care plan. 

Tip #1 
Shift your thinking
No mom is perfect, there is no perfect mom!! You have to shift the mentally that a mom has everything perfect and is successful. This is crucial to understand. Shifting your way of thinking can be stressful, as mothers we tend to believe that everything we do for our children has to be in perfect order. Being a mom, a never ending job that we never know if we are right or wrong. 

Tip #2 
Focus on self-care

I can emphasize enough how important this tip is. Mom life is selfless, is about putting all of our energy into another human being. But sometimes we focus so much on caring for our children and family that we forget to take care of our self. 

Be deliberate in having "Me Time." And no. this does not mean having alone time to cook, clean or do laundry. This means, having a commitment to yourself to take 30 minutes or 1 hour each day in an activity that brings you joy. Making time for self care is so crucial.  Go do things that make you happy. Go get your hair done. Or your nails done. Or take a long bubble bath. Read a book. Start a blog. Whatever it is that you want to do, but do anything that is focusing on YOU!

Tip # 3
Spend time with your spouse or boyfriend

Is important to spent some alone time with your significant other. Is good to remember what is like to to just be two instead of just mom and dad. Just think about this, if you feeling burnout, maybe your husband or boyfriend is feeling some type of way too. 

Tip #4 

Even If It's the last thing you want to do. Who I'm kidding I haven't had time to exercise in over two months. However, when I did exercised I remember how good those 30-45 minutes were. Even if it was just a home workout, it was something better than nothing. I felt so good after wards. I was working towards my goals, had some time to focus on me, and distress. Exercise helps me feel better, it lifted my spirits and refocus me. This is my number #1 goal this year to exercise more. 

Tip #5
Dress up 

This tip and tip # 2 are important to me, because these were things I did regularly before or even after kids. However, after your child gets older it gets a little bit easier to do things. Since I have an 8 month old baby It tends to get hard to get back on track. This tip is significant to me because, when I dress up and get my makeup done I feel like a totally different person. I feel happier, ready to conquer the world, my self esteem is up the roof, and I'm overall good. I'm a better mom because I dress up and put some makeup on. 

And no this does not means putting on some yoga pants, leggings, workout pants, anything involving spandex or stretchy material. 

This means to actually get dress, some nice booties, heels, dress, jeans with top. Either some nice makeup or very natural makeup. Is even getting your hair done, not having a mom bun. Bottom line: The way you feel in your clothes, influences your energy and overall self confidence.

Remember: Energy speaks volume. 

Tip #6
Always remember, being a mom is the best job in the world!

I know it's really easy to get overwhelmed, and stress about all of the things that come along with being a mom, but it's also important to remember how incredible mom life is. Sure, it may be completely different from what your custom too, but motherhood is just that- a whole other world.

Being a mom is the hardest job I've ever done, but it's also the most rewarding job I have experienced. For every bad day, for every long night, and sleepless day comes a beautiful worthwhile moment. Although  I am crazy busy and stressed at times, there's nothing that I rather be doing than watching my girls grow up everyday. So every time you feel lost, frustrated, irritated, and overwhelmed, take a step back give yourself a few minutes to breath, and go give your baby some kisses. I'm sure watching them laugh or giggle takes away all of your frustration in a blink of an eye.

Most importantly, go easy on yourself!

You are doing the best you can, don't strive for perfection. In order to be the best mom, you first need to take care of yourself.


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